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Wednesday, third day of a regular class week. I really thought I was an OCD organized personality!! Try shuffling school, home, and running your own company!!! Last eve, instead of homework, I spent the eve reviewing class notes, online notes, emails, and messages, then combining them into a clearly scheduled method of attack. How many classmates did I talk with today that still did not understand the multitude of project expectations, where flurries of questions are hanging in the air, even once the Professor responds? Ahhhhhh, this smells a little like the beginnings of an adventure extraordinaire!!!
Focus..
Today is September 11th. So many professionals my age have had their opportunities taken from them. Lest we forget. So thrive on opportunity. Thrive on Life. Thrive because you can.
School is a 40 hour work week. How many of us older ladies have worked longer than the 40 hours, within horrible, degrading employment for below poverty wages? Come on! Lot's of us! I know I have!! If someone confronted us saying "You Cannot Ever Have the Opportunity to Higher Education and a Higher Wage and Employment with Dignity", wouldn't you stand in defiance? They don't do that though, do they? They make false promises of continued training, higher pay, better working conditions, don't they? Even our Government will not stand to assist those of us working in below poverty level jobs. We have to be laid off, destitude and morally degraded before assistance may or many not assist us. Does this sound bleak? Yes! This is where I stagnated for the last 10 years and I encountered so many talented women, stuck in stagnation as well. A community of women with drained hopes? How is this beneficial or profitable to our Community?
Then I enter side stage. "Hi, My name is Veronica and I have a dream." The more I put opportunity before women to really dream, the more our system shut them down, "re-draining" their new found hopes. I "GET IT". I am just me after all. I never said I was more than "Just Me". However as JUST ME, I LOVE MY LIFE!!! Has my life, my career been crushed, side winded and backstabbed? Yes!!!! Have I come back swinging? Well, no. I came back with LOVE. Are either way the right way? It depends on your personality. I would have like to come back "swinging love". It might have made for an easier route to success of my goals.
It has taken me 10 years to learn what so many take for granted, what so many professionals like me have had taken from them. Their opportunities in life. If you have a goal go at it swinging! This is your right as a human being. It is inconsequential what "this world" has put upon you to battle, do it anyways. This is your right! Once you recognize this, you will comprehend that you must make the conscious or subconscious choice to claim your rights! We cannot control the global radicals. I wish we could. What we can control are our own actions.
To all you women, who wish, who wonder, who believe, dream, ask, and achieve. It is your right to claim. Never stop. Never stagnate. Never, and I mean never let your hopes be dependent on one company or one person. Take control. Claim your right to control your life and never, absolutely never give up.
Focus.
My first grading from college was an 86%. No where close to where my goal is to be. Am I pissed? Oh, damn right I am!!! In my eyes, I suck at school. I expect MORE of me because I have goals. My goals for me, demand a 98% at my worst!!!
Focus.
Choose your goals that apply to you. Focus. Then just do it!!! You know you can. I know you can. People around you, too afraid to take that first step, know you can as well. You simply must believe in you! This is OUR REVOLUTION ladies! Focus, Believe and Do It!! There are so many in our global community that don't dare to dream to live our opportunities because they don't have the same opportunities! Don't waste them and do not enable anyone to take them from you.
There are a few ladies like me in my class that are returning to school. If somehow they have found an avenue, can't you? Never give up. If my beautiful friend Gail had not suggested I return to school, I wouldn't have taken the leap of belief.
Belief in me.
You must believe in you.
This is our Revolution.
THE REVOLUTION OF WOMEN WHO BELIEVE IN THEMSELVES & IN EACH OTHER.
I am counting on you, and you are counting on me. If one of us falters, the others will not fail, but continue to believe in our own abilities.
Focus.
It is the 2nd week of school, 1st week of regular classes. Have a glass of wine. Breathe. Organize. Review the steps to your Goal. Believe in you, because their are others like us, watching, waiting. They believe in you, so that they will eventually find the strength to believe in themselves.
Focus.
V xo
Day Four in Orientation. The Presentation of our Business Luncheon Guests. I had an interesting revelation! I am much more prepared to speak about GTOC than I am about anything else. A weakness YES!! One I can improve on ... Absolutely!!!! Just one of the reasons I am returning to school.
Upon reflection, this first week of "returning to school" has held it's challenges for this old girl. The biggest challenge was to slow down my life/work/personal pace to suit the agenda. This was the most difficult!! I have worked 24/7/365 for 10 years at a pace that could cripple others and has crippled me at times.
The first three days of class my legs danced to the beat of my own drum. My plans to achieve the moment class let out. I barely heard the professor over the sound of the tsunami in my brain. """"Work, make money, work, people are dependant on you, work, kids need supper and a ride, work, work, work. Why Aren't YOU Working!!!! """"
After class I raced out, bought food, texted my monsters and everyone else who had emailed, texted throughout the day, arranged my calendar, found furniture for a family in need, sorted donated clothing to go where it is needed, ...I tried to cut my grass but could not find the additional energy!!! Today, Friday.....my pace slowed just a little. The panic to achieve quick results, slowed just a little.
The stress of an adult, with adult responsibilities returning to school are unrelenting. This week,
Gabriel became "bothered" and needed not only extra attention. He needed time. Real time. Not the fake time like cuddling and sleeping. Real time in communication.
Sissy needed dental attention for the pain in her teeth mouth as well as registration in a new school, and travel pick up and drop off time. PLUS daily after school discussions.
Conor didn't need specific time, but guidance on organizing his free days until the Reserves calls him up and the discussions over the increasing stress of awaiting the call.
My darling Aunt Lorraie passed away. Probably the 1st progressive career mom in our family. While not overly close with me, there is a holding pattern of sadness around my heart. The last of a generation has ended with beauty and grace, yet never the less ...ended.
The job terminated.
The rogue bank manager that adversely affected 9 years of correcting my financial picture.
The three mortgages OSAP cannot cover if we choose to eat this school semester.
The families I try to help while my own struggles.
However here is the thing. We....my monsters and I. Are accustomed to the struggles in life. I am not down playing the struggles, my monsters shouldn't have to continuously attempt to grow within struggles. I have made enough money to make them more comfortable, but instead I feed it into the needs of GTOC's women. Together though, we are strong. We have learnt the importance within our lives.
We know we will eventually sleep and eat. We know that work and play are a complete function of a day. We choose to only stress over the absolute. Safety. Because we love each other so very much, we have been without everything else. It is only our love of each other, affected, that can permanently hinder our lives.....
So I sit here, completing my daily blog so that women/mother's like me will recognize their abilities similar to my own to get away from the job that will keep them below poverty for the remainder of their lives, and with courage, step forward to expand their opportunities. To further their possibilities. To halt the worlds effort to keep a downwards thumb to their efforts.
And I focus on the goal of which I have two. One, show other women just like me, that they too can do this!!! and Two, create the missing link to the structure of taking GTOC next level.
It may be precedent. Perhaps it has never been accomplished prior. Is that supposed to mean it cannot be done? Did the Wright bros. base their goals on precedent? Did Edison?.....
Aim high. Forget the "low lack of goals" in those who would place their thumbs on you. Believe in you. Unfalteringly. Just do it.
For the next 5 years, at least....I will be running on faith. The belief that I can achieve my goals. GTOC will achieve it's goals! And women will begin to stand and believe in themselves. Because I am nobody. I am nothing. And in my everything....I am doing it. So can you!! V xo
September 5th, 2013Day three in orientation. A real treat for me especially. Our group has a business luncheon meeting with one of my father's previous colleagues at Warkworth Penn. I understand what it was like to grow up under security regulations necessary for the position. I also understand the level of stress I watched my father endure. It was a "hell hole" and it took a magnaminous personality to thrive in this type of workplace atmosphere. Our guest defined the term magnaminous personality. It was as if I was talking with my father from beyond the grave.
I sit in repose this eve, reflecting on my father. What would his conversation had been with me, regarding my direction of career? Would he be proud? Or would he rever met back to that little girl who was taught to believe her grandest purpose was to be a good mom? My father had a huge influence on my life, obviously.
Times have changed. Generations have grown. Life experiences very much dictate who we are and how we react to life. I expect more from me.
Our Guest, reiterates through various posed questions, the importance of respect, empowerment and transparent vision. Success is dependant on it. My memories return to my dad, the true storyteller, illustrating compassion and love of humanity in his daily life within the penn walls. In fact it was his love of humanity that took him away from us in the end. However, I believe given the choice, he would not have changed his path. Like him, I too am a believer.
How difficult can you imagine it was to sit before a personality who quotes words/beliefs identical to your late father that you idolize? Actually for the first time (because I have many business luncheons) I felt at home. I held an immediate respect for our guest for championing a difficult role with grace while maintaining love of mankind (the good the bad and the ugly)
Given my career choice via GTOC I have been dependant on Corporate heads/friends to connect their advices to my mission, yet I have been attempting to replicate childhood memories of my father's love of people's lives to support my corporate life mission.
It was as if my father "sent" our Guest to reaffirm where I am headed.
Yes I think my father would be very proud of me and my accomplishment thus far. My love of people. My belief that even through the good, the bad and the ugly....people deserve respect and the opportunity to better quality of life, however they choose to define it. My father would be proud that I decided to return to school to learn to better structure GTOC to achieve it's own greatness by believing in the very people society turns it's back on.
While the vision will remain steadfast, creating a self sufficient tri-module that can be applied to any global society, the micro and macro structure will be adaptable to each and every global society in need of it's mission. And There Are Too Many!!!
I encourage all to open their minds to their own potentials. Higher education will accomplish exactly that. Believe it will be difficult. But no more difficult than not setting a goal to achieve. We have earned this right of higher education. If you have thought of it as a goal, a possibility, don't shuck it.
I am doing this partially to show you, it is a realistic goal. There is always a way. Just ask, Just believe, Just do it. You deserve the Quality of Life you work so hard for. V xo
September 4th, 2013
Day two in school. Jumping both feet into the orientation of business as we know it. In fact everything we know is business. Church, School, GTOC, Government, Retail, .... Everything.
What I know is that I have learned over the years to market myself.
" Me.Inc."
Best advice I ever paid immediate attention to, "Market Yourself, Make Yourself Transparent" Hence my time on face book. Whether anyone agrees with me or not is irrelevant. I put it all out there.
My group today was wonderfully intelligent. Very refreshing. Each member with strengths that complimented the others. It won't always be that way. Sometimes we will get members that drain the team. Today's lesson, team work. Identifying individual strengths to work as a team.
I sit in class rather introspective. I am so different from my class mates. Financially my biggest concern is making it through the year without distracting my time from class while I try to make enough money to support not only GTOC but my family.
My belief structure in me, in my family, in my world is so strong. I know this is the right path.
Once in awhile, I question my intelligence to accomplish this goal. I remind myself that my goal is too unrealistically high for a lowly person such as myself. But then I wonder, what do others have that makes them worthy? So much more worthy than myself? Belief!!!
I step forward in my voice. I communicate because I believe in those I represent. The women I encourage to return to a higher education. They give me courage. Whether they know it or not. I am drawing on it.
I delve into our team. Tomorrow we stand to represent. Time to prepare. We each have our role in this team. I am nobody. Yet I represent many somebodies. Can't wait to witness them take this plunge as I have. We are a team with a goal. We support each others' efforts. Now and in our futures. Make unrealistic goals. Let's make realistic steps to achieve them!!! V xo
September 3rd, 2013
The Concept of "Returning to School" has been a foreign, inconceivable dream to me since my ex husband agreed to "stay home with all the kids" while I attended Queens University to become a Lawyer. Financially it made sense. As a mother, I cringed knowing the scent of pickling via beer/rye on his being would be the ruling factor within my children's caregiving. Not everyday, but unpredictable as to when and when it would become everyday. This was our life and so "returning to school" for the full education I always dreamt of became a foreign, inconceivable dream.
Once the children and I were abandoned, life became a fight for survival. There are varied avenues to successful survival. Personally I expected nothing less than a "spectacular" recovery from myself. Zero to Hero kinda concepts. Ten years later, I have achieved more than everyone's expectations, other than my own. According to me.....I have barely begun my journey.
Last week a very dear girlfriend made a note in our chat, that I should return to school. While I have desired this for an eternity and encouraged many others to make the step. I have discounted it for myself since my first attempt some years ago. A Brain Block of mega proportions!
The very idea of attaining my business degree immediately sparked my fondest attentions. My imaginations soared!! I knew I had the intelligence, I had been achieving business experience without the degree my entire adult life span. However, Did I have the financial capability???????
Honestly, it is going to be a tough go. A really tough go. I have 3 mortgages, and 3 kids to support.
Will I do It????. Damn right I will!!! I believe in me!!!! I always have, I just didn't always know how to. There are 2 reasons why this is so important to me:
1. I need to prove to my kids and to myself, that all aspirations and goals are attainable. For years I thought myself too stupid, too common, too useless to attend university. I now believe myself too intelligent, too spectacular and too resourceful not to. I want them to feel their worth as well.
2. Via GTOC, I have met an abundance of intelligent women, working in below poverty level employment, feeling trapped and either that the opportunity of higher education has escaped them or that they are not worthy or financially capable. I want to show them, ALL the trial and tribulations of "returning to school" are worth the risk of leaving their "gainful employment".
Our world needs the enhancement of the adults that have been shut away, stuck in survival. Let's start challenging this world of poverty around us.
Women / Men.....who are working in positions of employment simply to survive. Let's find another way. No one including our government will make it easy and I am not saying it will be easy. I am saying it will be hard. However, only for a time frame and within that timeframe is the hope of change to better quality of life. Sure is better than remaining positioned within employment that holds you eternally from better quality of life.
So I am going to blog on this topic often. Tune in. If you know someone who could benefit, link it to them. I will be talking of my kids, bucking my additional time working away from them, How I am going to try to incorporate family life into the extra work frame, How GTOC will keep inching forward, How I have to make up the money OSAP does not provide for in real life circumstances of a Single Mom.
I know you can do this too. Watch, read, join in.....with faith. If you desire this, you will see success and achieve it too!! To my friends and colleagues and clients,....I am still achieving all I said I would for GTOC and for you!!! I take a lot of vitamins and healthy supplements to maintain this level of energy to success. To you ladies and gentlemen who have entertained the dream of "returning to school" ... stay tuned.... together we CAN do this because we plan to achieve our dreams. !!! V xo
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